Well i've never had a car
Never been near a lorry
Got a nasty habit of scratching my nose
My codename's happy harry
I'm into cb



I've had loads of jobs
For very minute lolly
Creation schemes
So i suppose i was lucky
And the money it took
To buy a cb set
Took lines off my belly
My codename's cedar plank
I'm into cb
I'm into cb



At 16 i drank cheap sherry
Got plastered in the stations and swing parks
Off my mother i stole some money
Had a treat with a bottle of martini
So sick i couldn't walk or sit
Since then i've not touched it
I won't bore you with tales of being greedy
I'm just into cb
I'm into cb



My family's a weird lot
My stepsister's got a horrible growth
Listens to all this muzak shit
Reads smash hits while she's eating her tea
To me it sounds like bad cb



My father's not bad really
He got me these wires and bits
Apart from that he talks to me hardly
I'm just into cb



This is happy harry plank
From the land of waving palms
Calling out to cedar plank
477 cc
There's no code 13
In the home of chocolate city
I'm having trouble with the terminology
But i'm into cb



I've got this letter before me
It's buff with a confidential seal
I'd better open it
It's a fine and a formal threat
I should of listened to new face in hell
The date expired last week
Up here i forget what time it is
It says you're going to go when you go
Or else you're for it boy
If that's what you get for having a hobby
Next mail you get will be mail in jail
If that's what you get for having a hobby
Next year mail in jail
It that's what you get for having a hobby
Next time i'm out i'll join a riot
That's the last you'll hear for me
I'll keep clear of cb
Keep clear of cb