Now, if i was a bricklayer,
I wouldn't build just anything;
And if i was a ball player,
I wouldn't play no second string.
And if i were some jew'lry, baby;
Lord, i'd have to be a diamond ring.

If i were a secret, lord, i never would be told.
If i were a jug of wine, lord, my flavor would be old.
I could be most anything,
But it got to be twenty-four karat solid gold, oh.

If i were a gambler, you know i'd never lose,
And if i were a guitar player,
Lord, i'd have to play the blues.

If i was a hacksaw, my blade would be razor sharp.
If i were a politician, i could prove that monkeys talk.
You can find the tallest building,
Lord, i'd have me the house on top.

Oh, let's go!
All right, keep goin'!

I'm the penthouse pauper;
I got nothin' to my name.
I'm the penthouse pauper; baby,
I got nothing to my name.
I can be most anything,
'cause when you got nothin' it's all the same.

Oh, let's move to this song!
Lord, look at my penthouse.