I gave up a min of cheese
To Domino's delivery
Whiskey sours
Apple pies
Finger-lickin' chicken fried
Are gastronomic history
I used to like them scary shows
But I gave 'em up a while ago
Don't do no dip-defyin'
Rollercoster ridin'
Now days I just take it slow
Every since we started datin'
I been compensantin'
To keep from gettin' up
To hell any quicker
'Cause

CHORUS:

She's hard on the ticker
Hard on the ticker
The girl is such a hazard that she oughta have a sticker
Sayin' hard on the ticker


Now, when she wiggles through my door
My chin gets heavy
Hits the floor
Silky hair
Garnet lips
Swingin' double-jointed lips
My blood begins to roar
And when she nibbles on me ear
It's partly pleasure, partly dear
Little dab is all it takes
To get my heart a palpatatin'
Fellin' like the end is near
I oughta get a policy
A double indemity
It'd make my beneficiary
A whole lot richer
'Cause

(Repeat chorus)

That's my girl
Yeah, she's hard on the ticker
I oughta get a policy
A double indemity
It'd make my benificiary
A whole lot richer----

(Repeat chorus)

Oh, she's hard on the ticker
She's hard on the ticker
Hey, she's hard on the ticker